Gedichten

I have lived all those years,
But I did not experience anything nice.
In my inner self revealed that bad feeling,
I bet you do not know what I mean. Still I look into the empty darkness, As always, waiting for a new beginning. I try to believe in the new beginning, But I already know for sure: the dark can not promise me anything.
I lie in the room, tired and wounded
While no one was standing with me.
So I do not know what love is,
Because I do not know, you are not wrong.
I run quite a distance with my tear-struck face. I do not know where, but in any case not in that house where I do not set foot anymore. Why is there abuse in life, why does it never stop? Why is there abuse in life why is there no stop?
I was kicked and beaten it took hours, days, months and years.Sometimes I think to myself why am I born.The arms in which I have felt safe, Are changed to arms for which I fear. Arms that scare me. I feel them in my dreams.
Hands that I liked so well,
His changed is razor-sharp knives.
Hands that have left scratches everywhere.
They cut through my dreams and make nightmares
A stepfather that I loved so much. Has turned into a monster! A father who could not keep his hands at home. I can feel you everywhere. How long I will shower
How much time would pass over this too
How many people I will speak
I will never forget your dirty hands on my body. I stay with dirty hands like tattoos on my body. What does life mean?
if your world seems to stand still,
looking for that new beginning
but it does not even seem to exist ...
Caught in endless questions,
full of tears that drown you,
your hope that is quietly fading,
because you are sinking deeper and deeper. So you have done your best,
for all you live for, but you always seem to stand alone again, because you are on the wrong path. But how can you know which path is right for you,
and you want to forget everything, because you are going to be broken, because of all those tears of loss.
How can you know what is right or wrong?
because everything keeps on eating to you,
and so remember your true feelings. Haunted by shadow. Shadow of the past.It still did not slip away from me.The dark figure
Follow me everywhere. My mind at zero
Not another valley. My legs running
Can not stop, Yet the shadow remains
Just lure me. I am only the piece of bait, but I remain the shadow boss


29 september 2019
Jeska